Positive Change Starts and Ends in the Mind with Angela Johnson

Paul Salter:

Hey, Angela. Thank you so much for joining me today. How are you?

Angela Johnson:

Hi, Paul. I’m doing great. Thanks for inviting me.

Paul Salter:

Absolutely. I’m so sad your dog couldn’t join us live, but maybe next time. He will be there in the background, I’m sure. But I’m really looking forward to really diving in to share more about … Not only the incredible results you’ve had, but just some of the big mindset shifts and the behavior changes you’ve made … Really, these last six months, because I think a lot of the challenges you face, so many people listening can really relate to on a deep level. And I’m really excited to let the listeners in on just how possible these changes are when you’re clear on what you want, why you want it, and the excuses we need to stop making, and the changes we need to start making. So again, thank you for being here.

Angela Johnson:

Sure thing. Thank you.

Paul Salter:

Absolutely. So let’s kick things off here, and kind of bring the listeners up to speed. Tell us a little bit more about your diet and weight loss industry relationship and journey, and ultimately where you were just prior to connecting with me and joining the 5% Community.

Angela Johnson:

So I had joined about six months ago, back in November. And I had been working out at the gym with Sweat with Jess, in northeast Minneapolis, and just enjoying having a consistent workout routine. I had found that I knew that I enjoyed putting in the work there, but I felt like my discipline was leaving me as I was in the kitchen, and I just didn’t carry that strength over. I had all of this promise and potential that I felt like I was striving for, but I didn’t know how to translate that to food.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. And was that something you had found had always been a challenge for you, even prior to beginning your strength training journey?

Angela Johnson:

Absolutely. Definitely, ever since I was a kid.

Paul Salter:

Okay. Is there any particular moment that stands out, that kind of set the tone for your relationship with food, or maybe your eating behaviors, early on?

Angela Johnson:

Well, I knew that my mom had always had a jaded relationship with food because of her relationship with her mom, and she was doing everything she could to kind of break that generational curse. And I still feel like I maybe picked up some other things in the opposite direction, in terms of overindulging, and having plenty to eat, and not restricting as much.

Paul Salter:

Okay, okay. That’s interesting you mentioned kind of the generational relationship that’s passed down, one generation to the next, because it’s so true, because we’re such sponge … So sponge-like, rather, at that young age, that we absorb all those eating behaviors that maybe the parents don’t think we see, or we don’t notice. Maybe they don’t pick up that they’re doing, when operating on autopilot. And then we fast-forward to adulthood, and we’re like, “Oh shit. Mom used to do that, too. And so did grandma, and so did great-grandma.” And it’s like, wait a second, where does it stop? How does it stop? So it’s great that she was able to start recognizing, okay, something needs to change. You were able to pick up a few positive nuggets, but still found yourself with a few other areas you wanted to change, as well.

And then, when you’re in your groove of just consistently kicking ass the gym … And for everyone listening, Angela is freaking strong. And she might not ever confidently say that as excitedly as I do, but you are incredibly strong. I think it’s awesome. I love seeing your PRs when you share them in our community. But at that point, just prior to reaching out and getting connected with me, how would you describe your eating behaviors and your relationship with food?

Angela Johnson:

I would say it was pretty inconsistent. I knew some of the basics, such as protein being the most important macronutrient, and trying to prioritize that. But I love food. I love baking. I love trying new recipes. And I would find myself trying to stick to macros on MyFitnessPal, but not really being able to be consistent with it, and knowing that it was my fault, but not knowing how to really commit.

Paul Salter:

Looking back, obviously … I know hindsight’s 20/20. Where do you think was the biggest source of frustration that led to inconsistency with some type of macro tracking or food logging?

Angela Johnson:

I think that I would just get overwhelmed with eating something that wasn’t planned, and not knowing how to track it. So then, I would just not track the rest of the day, or track the rest of the week, and just kind of have that fuck it mentality that would snowball. And I would just start again on a random Monday, and give it my best effort.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. So if you had to go back in time and use, let’s say, three adjectives to describe how you felt about your relationship with food, and maybe just yourself in general, what comes to mind at that period of your life?

Angela Johnson:

Inconsistent, hopeful, and doubtful, as well.

Paul Salter:

Doubtful that something could work and really stick for you?

Angela Johnson:

Yes, because it had never before.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. No, I totally understand that. And I appreciate you sharing that with us. So I’m curious, was there a particular point where you recognized, “You know what? Despite trying many times, I can’t do this alone. I need some type of outside support, coaching, or community?” Was there a particular moment where you really had that realization that spawned that change?

Angela Johnson:

Yes. I remember the moment exactly. It was a Monday morning, and I had shown up for myself at Sweat with Jess at 6:00 AM, and I was uncomfortable in my clothes. And I knew that I had been overindulging for probably a couple months, at that point, and that I was my biggest weight ever, and just felt uncomfortable in my own skin. And I had started to have all of these negative thoughts. And I just wanted to say to Jess, “What do I do?” But Jess is the kind of person that really empowers women and men not to be a victim of their own self-doubt and negative self-talk. So I knew if I approached her with it, she would want me to have a solution. So I really needed to harness that.

I asked her for help. I said, “What do I do?” And she, of course, had worked with you in the past, and really emphasized to me that a journey with you starts with the mental aspect of understanding food and nutrition. And I knew that my psychology behind this wasn’t in a positive mind state. And I really needed to change that, or I was going to continue to be in this pattern, this cycle of spinning this hamster wheel, and all the work I was putting in at the gym wasn’t making a difference in how I felt or looked about myself.

Paul Salter:

So kind of a two steps forward in the gym, Monday through Friday, three steps back over the weekend, or while traveling, was taking place?

Angela Johnson:

Exactly.

Paul Salter:

Okay. Yeah. I can totally get that. And I guess, I’m curious to know, when you connected with Jess, you learned there was someone and something … Myself and the 5% Community being something that she recommended and trusted, because I’ve had the pleasure of knowing Jess for six plus years now, and working with her. Such a tremendous human being. But you kind of got that seal of approval by someone you trusted. What were you hoping to change? What were you hoping to feel, as you began to accept if something’s going to change, I need to change, and it looks like putting myself and my nutrition atop the priority list?

Angela Johnson:

Well, I knew that I needed to improve the way I spoke to myself, and that the spiral of the negative words, and you know … You try to think of how you would talk to a friend. And that’s the first thing I thought of, is I would not say any of these things to any other lady working out with me. So why should I say that to myself?

Paul Salter:

Is there a common example, maybe a phrase or a word you used to use in some of that internal dialogue with yourself, that was just … Looking back, is cringe-worthy, like I can’t believe I said that?

Angela Johnson:

I’m never going to change. I’m fat. I’m so gross.

Paul Salter:

And obviously, that does trickle into your relationship with food, yourself, and influence your behaviors, as you’ve learned. So we’re really looking to make some positive changes, plant the right seeds, if you will, in how you speak to yourself. In addition to that, what else were you really hoping to change, so that you could begin feeling better, and then actually see the results of your incredible consistency and hard work in the gym?

Angela Johnson:

Well, I definitely wanted to be able to nip that in the bud, and not allow it to spiral into the next meal, spiral into not caring anymore. I knew that I needed to focus on overcoming myself at those emotional points, and really focus on the positive. And I know that I’ve been putting hard work in the gym. I know that at this point, I’ve built an incredible basis of useful tools to help me make the right choices and understand how to navigate situations that I didn’t have before.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. So operation or priority, rather, number one was let’s transform the self-talk completely, get the default to be at least … If not completely positive in the beginning, at least neutral. That’s a big positive change from negative, to negative to neutral, and we’ll work to positive. How would you describe what you were hopeful and feeling on a regular basis? What were the emotions you wanted to be present, rather than doubtful, uncertain, and inconsistent?

Angela Johnson:

I wanted to feel confident in my own skin, in my ability to have a positive relationship with food. I wanted to feel sexy. I wanted to move through the world without constantly thinking of the size of my body.

Paul Salter:

I love that. Yeah. So well said. So I’m curious. In your journey thus far, six plus months, what are two, maybe three of the things you have learned about yourself, that have given you … Empowered you, rather, with the tools and the belief in yourself to make these positive changes?

Angela Johnson:

Well, I would definitely say being kind yourself is number one. That’s where it starts, because I feel like diet culture has really gotten us away from loving ourselves. And we’ve kind of been in … What I like to think of as the era of loving yourself and body positivity. And I think that it’s a great time to be alive. I also think striving for consistency, and not perfection, was something that was hard to get over as a quote-unquote perfectionist, and feeling like I need to have all the pieces of my life together. This is something that’s a journey. And I’m likely not ever going to feel 100% like I’ve reached it. But I mean, that’s kind of the beauty of life, too. You’re always striving for something. So I just have to … I’ve been learning to love myself now, and not who I want to be.

Paul Salter:

I love that. So let’s unpack the changes in your self-talk these last, I guess … Six plus months is no shortage of time, to say the least. What has worked for you, whether it’s an insight, a comment, or just a new frame of mind? Looking at the impact of your self-talk, what has really stood out to you, to help facilitate these positive changes in how you speak to yourself?

Angela Johnson:

Well for me, I knew, at the gym, that the community was incredibly important. So when I learned that there was a 5% Community, and what that was all about, I knew that I want to be part of it. And being able to engage with everyone on Slack, meet them in person, and just have a positive group of people that are striving for the same thing, that means everything to me. It means I’m not alone. It means I have people I can ask questions to. I have people who are supporting me, and who are really just living life. And we’re all just trying to live life without hating ourselves, honestly. I mean, there’s so much self-hate, and it can easily eat away at all the precious time we have. I just didn’t want to waste any more damn time.

Paul Salter:

I love that. Yeah. There’s just something magical about surrounding yourself with like-minded people. And sometimes it is a little bit indescribable, but you feel heard. You feel seen. And it’s not like we’re surrounded in a community of people who operate as robots, and eat these perfectly portioned meals in beautiful Tupperwares every day. No. These are moms of three, career women, people wearing multiple hats, juggling multiple jobs. And it’s like … They’re not perfect either, but they’re, in their own ways, perfect. They do what they perfectly need to do, which is just be consistent in the areas that matter most to them, that help them feel their best.

So yeah. It’s just this blessing to be able to be surrounded by such incredible women there. But I love what you said, too. You can’t hate yourself into positive change. So it’s also contagious, when you are surrounded by other people who are just like you, ready to make positive changes, and excited about it, but inevitably have a little bit of fear, hesitation, and anxiety, too. But when you bring all that together, it’s like all the negative emotions kind of fall by the wayside, and it continues to turn into hope, positivity, inspiration, and ultimately action.

Angela Johnson:

Absolutely. Like I had just said, I mean, you wouldn’t say those negative things to a friend. So I mean, we lift each other up in the community, and that’s really what I was looking for.

Paul Salter:

That’s great to hear. So was there one particular action step or practice, that you might even currently have in place, that has really helped support the transformation in your self-talk, to date?

Angela Johnson:

Can you repeat the question?

Paul Salter:

Yeah, absolutely. I’m curious, is there something you’ve done on a regular basis, or maybe just some thought or lesson in the curriculum you think back to often, that has really helped facilitate lasting change in how you speak to yourself?

Angela Johnson:

I would say that the mantra never miss twice has really hit home, and been a powerful statement to me. Going back to the fuck it mentality, and letting that just kind of spiral out of control. I think, focusing on … Okay. You went off track. That’s okay. Just get back on it. And having the confidence, and know that … Hey, I’ve got the tools to do that. I’ve got the go-to meals at home. I’ve got my meal prepped. And if I was caught at the office, and didn’t get a chance to plan as well as I could, well, I’ll get right back on track. And I know that.

Paul Salter:

Yeah, I love that. I remember the first time I heard that, too. I was like, “Oh my gosh. I’m keeping that one close to the vest for myself, personally, but sharing it with as many people as possible.” It’s so simple, but it’s so significantly impactful. So, so good.

Angela Johnson:

And I think what’s powerful about it is it allows for the grace, but it also … It’s motivating you to get back up there.

Paul Salter:

A thousand percent. And hopefully, too, if you recognize that you are able to give yourself that grace, that permission, to not be perfect, it also probably helps facilitate you being more present, and really enjoying that moment where you choose to intentionally indulge. Or maybe it is the off chance you’re choosing to sleep in a couple extra hours, rather than get to your typical morning workout, because your body’s just telling you, “You need to stay in bed.” But right back at the next opportunity, you’re on track, and then onward you go, continuing with that consistency. I love that.

And speaking of consistency, you already self-proclaimed you love to eat. You love to try new foods. You love experiencing new restaurants. You travel a decent amount. And when we first started working together, that was one of the challenges. It’s like, “Okay. I do know what to do, but this Friday, I’m going to this restaurant. This Saturday, I’m going here.” I mean, you were the leader for our Minnesota meetup for finding the best dessert spot, and facilitating that, when we all got together. So what are some of the changes you’ve made, Angela, to feel more confident and more in control? That you can still enjoy yourself amongst all of these trips and social occasions, but it doesn’t mean you have to eat like an asshole, and undo your hard work while you’re attending them?

Angela Johnson:

So of course, as I’ve learned from you, got to prioritize protein and veggies. Have a fricking drink if you want it, or two. And I think I’ve kind of learned to listen to myself a little bit more as I’m eating. I recently went out with friends, and I got my classic fried chicken sandwich. And it came, and it was so big. And I immediately asked for a box, because I knew that I couldn’t finish the whole thing. I didn’t want to try and finish the whole thing. And I was able to enjoy some of it, share it with my husband later on. But I think just kind of eating more slowly, really listening to yourself as you’re eating, drinking water. To get things started, sometimes I’ll start with a mocktail before I have a cocktail. I just am trying to enjoy myself, but not go too crazy with all of the rules. Just be easy, be simple.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. And what about during the time when you are home? What would you attribute some of this really just renewed sense of consistency to? Is there one particular habit that has really helped you stay on track when you are home, not traveling or dining out?

Angela Johnson:

I would say having the to-go meals and the prep work. I mean, that is the biggest game changer, because I’m totally a victim of opening the fridge and wanting something juicy and delicious to be there. But if I have some tasty snacks, my protein drinks, things that I enjoy … And also a variety of them, too. I really got to switch it up here and there, but have some basics, as well.

Paul Salter:

I love that. So tell us a little more. What does the weekly routine of … Whether it’s preparing individual meals, or bulk-prepping single ingredients, what does that look like for you?

Angela Johnson:

So I usually do a Sunday cook, or my husband. And we’ll cook our meal for Sunday, and a couple meals thereon. And then typically Tuesday, as well. Sometimes he’s traveling, so it’s just me. This week, I did Monday, Tuesday … Or Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday, because I wanted different kinds of proteins, and I was eating it all.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. Love it. Yeah. And I think that’s what’s been one of the most exciting things from my perspective, is seeing how inconsistent your meal prep was, how kind of overcomplicated it was for you, at times. The too much reliance on recipes here, or thinking it had to be harder than it was. And the way we’ve been able just to simplify, streamline to influence consistency has been such a game changer for you.

Angela Johnson:

Absolutely. And I feel like there still is inconsistency, as is life. There’s always schedule changes. So each week is different, but I know that … Focus on the protein and the veggies, getting some greens in there, and the rest will fall into place.

Paul Salter:

Yeah, I love it. And outside of the nutrition, just education and accountability you’ve had the opportunity to take advantage of, where else have you seen the impact of being a part of the 5% Community benefit you in your life?

Angela Johnson:

Well, I think that having more confidence in general really allows me to move throughout the day, and enjoy myself a little bit more. Not going to work like, “I don’t want to wear these clothes.” I work from home two days out of the week, and then I work in the office the other three. So I still get to wear comfy clothes a couple days, and I only have three days that I actually have to put professional clothes on. So it’s nice to have more clothes in my collection to be able to wear. I mean, just yesterday, I put on this dress that I haven’t put on in years. And I had remembered it was a little bit tight, and it was actually loose. And I felt fantastic. And I got so many compliments, like it was a new dress. But no. It had just been in my closet not being touched, because I was scared to put it on, and how I would feel.

Paul Salter:

I love hearing that. Yeah. I mean, I often say confidence is the most sought after, powerful drug in the world. We all desire it. We all deserve it. And when it eludes us, or it comes and goes way too inconsistently, it can throw us rock bottom into a depression. And we’re feeling hopeless, rather than hopeful. But when we have it, like holy shit, are we unstoppable and untouchable.

Angela Johnson:

That is for sure.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. So if you had to, I guess, extract two to three behavior changes that have most contributed to that feeling of confidence, where would you attribute it to?

Angela Johnson:

Well, I would say losing the weight. I lost 12 pounds since I started. So that has been really exciting, and incredibly powerful. And in turn, how that makes me feel when I put my clothes on now. I feel so much better. I feel like it’s not a guessing game of is this going to fit or not? So just being able to head towards the summer feeling confident in myself is gold.

Paul Salter:

Cool. I like that. Yeah. And it’s really interesting, because not only have you lost the weight, you’ve lost countless inches, too. So it’s showing up at everywhere, which is phenomenal. But I think what’s really neat is … It’s not like as soon as you joined, we dove headfirst into this restricted diet phase. No. We’ve made subtle changes to your meal prep routine, to your relationship with food, to how you navigate traveling, vacations, or weekends. You know, you got to come down here to sunny Florida once, if not a couple times, since you joined. And it’s like … We didn’t do this massive overhaul to your grocery list, to how you cook food, and limit the amount of different foods you could eat. We made a series of subtle changes at a pace that you deemed appropriate. And it’s just really accumulated … Or rather, I think, compounded is the right word here, into just fantastic changes across the board.

And the reason I want to bring that to the surface real quick, is just for those of you listening, so many of us are guilty of thinking, “Oh, I’ve got to just completely change everything all at once in order to lose the weight, or look a certain way, or feel a certain way.” And the truth is no, that’s counterproductive. You’re going to overwhelm yourself, and find yourself more often than not feeling defeated, frustrated, and overwhelmed. Whereas if you start with one small change, you get really consistent at it, it kind of snowballs into building confidence, consistency, and competency, which makes it more likely you want to take on another change, and another. And now, we’ve got this huge compounding interest of … Now I’m confident in how I look, what I wear, the scale’s going down, my energy’s through the roof, and just how I feel about myself is on cloud nine. It’s a really good place to be.

Angela Johnson:

Oh yeah, absolutely. And I’m one of the 5%-ers who has not yet participated in a diet. I found myself still inconsistent with the blueprint, and then I really just got sick and tired of my own shit. And I have been 100% this whole week. And the confidence that comes from that, knowing that I am keeping a promise to myself, is so powerful.

And I remember asking you in the beginning, “Do I have to diet?” And you had said, “No, you don’t.” And the thought of even dieting, even in the 5% Community, gives me some apprehension. But I know that I would never do it unless I was ready. And I know that I would be completely prepared with all of the tools. And I’m building up the tools now. And whether or not that even takes place, I really could care less. I’m just happy with the tools that I’m slowly building now. I knew this wasn’t going to be an overnight journey. I knew this was going to be a psychological and a mindset shift, and I was ready for that, and ready to take the time for that. I wasn’t looking for it, too.

Paul Salter:

I love that you brought that up, because I remember during those early conversations … I said like, “No, you don’t have to diet. But what do you want to work toward? How do you want to feel?” And I think that is one of the most powerful questions. If you can get clear on how you want to feel … And you mentioned these words earlier, there was confident, sexy, strong. And you said a couple others, of course, but it’s like dieting is not always the correct solution to get you to how you want to feel. You can just start making fewer promises to yourself, and actually keeping them. And maybe it’s drinking a certain amount of water, it’s kicking ass in the gym, it’s meal prepping twice a week, it’s prioritizing protein and veggies, it’s trying not to eat like an asshole when you’re dining out.

And again, it goes back to these series of small changes that add up to really yield incredibly large results. So I’m so happy you shared that, because so many people believe they have to enter that traditional restrictive calorie deficit in order to feel better. And more often than not, they do do that. They lose weight in 30 days really fast. They don’t feel any better. And then the approach they took there was unsustainable, so then they regress, and then they probably weigh even more than they once did. And it’s just this terrible cycle of yo-yo dieting.

Angela Johnson:

Absolutely.

Paul Salter:

So I’m curious to know then, Angela, if you could go back to a time when you were struggling, you were unhappy with how you felt, or what you saw in the mirror, or just how your incredible gym effort and performance wasn’t translating to either of those areas of your life, what would you go back and say to that younger version of you?

Angela Johnson:

I would say build up your basics. Build a positive mindset. Be kind to yourself. Negative self-talk is not going to help you. And understanding the importance of basic nutrition, and having a positive relationship with food.

Paul Salter:

Yeah, I love that. And I love your emphasis on be kind, too, because you are such a kind person. And sometimes we wouldn’t assume … You’re so kind. I’ve had the pleasure of getting to meet you and spend time with you in person on a couple occasions. We would never really assume, like, “Oh, she talks the complete opposite to herself in her own head.” It sounds so backwards, but we all suffer from it. And the more we let it go on, the more it just plants its roots into other areas of our life.

And I’m a firm believer … I know you’ve heard me say this before, that the most important relationship in our lives is the one we have with ourselves. If you start speaking kindly to yourself, that does show up, and it’s reflected in the foods you choose to nourish your body with, your relationship with food, your relationship with exercise, self-care, your significant other, your family, your friends. It all starts with you, and speaking kindly to yourself. So I’m so glad that helped you tremendously, but that you are able to now share and echo it for so many others.

Angela Johnson:

That is most definitely a goal of mine. And it has been something that I have noticed in myself over the last six months, is the improved positive self-talk, and … Yeah. Loving myself more.

Paul Salter:

Very good. So I’m curious, for those listening, who would you recommend joining the 5% Community to?

Angela Johnson:

I would recommend it to anyone who’s willing to commit themselves to a lifelong journey of body positivity, and positive food relationships.

Paul Salter:

I love that. And I especially really appreciate the word you used, willing to, because it’s not an easy journey, to say the least. It has plenty of friction, hardship, resistance, emotions coming to the surface, some of which you might not even have known were there. But I think you’d agree. I don’t want to speak for you, but it’s absolutely worth it.

Angela Johnson:

Oh, of course. Absolutely.

Paul Salter:

Yeah. Well, Angela, thank you so much for joining me today, and being so willing and kind to share more about your story and to share your learning lessons. I really appreciate it.

Angela Johnson:

It’s my pleasure.

Paul Salter:

Awesome. Awesome. Well, for those of you listening, thank you so much for tuning in to yet another episode of Screw the Scale Radio. It really means a lot to me, and I appreciate you being here. If you found this episode … If you found Angela’s story resonated with you, you connected with it, and you have someone in mind who also would find it valuable to listen to today’s episode and story, share this episode with her. Spread Angela’s incredible wisdom and story. Spread Screw the Scale Radio with another person, so that we can help them finally find the people, the tools, and the belief to feel, look, and be the best version of themselves.

And if you have not done so already, I would greatly appreciate taking 30 seconds to leave a genuine, honest review and rating on Apple Podcasts, or wherever it is you are listening to today’s show. Thank you, again, for being here. Have a wonderful rest of your day. And as always, screw the scale.