The 3-Step Blueprint to Feel Your Best in 2023 (And Beyond)

Paul Salter:

If you are sick of dieting at the turn of every new year and ready to learn how to truly feel your best, then it’s time to slow the fuck down, buckle up, and take a lot of notes while listening to today’s episode. Because in today’s episode I detail the three step blueprint I’ve used for years that serves as the foundation of the transformational model of change that we teach in the 5% community, which also happens to be the same foundation I’ve used while personally coaching more than 1,500 women to collectively losing tens of thousands of pounds of body fat and keeping it off for good. But most importantly, to feeling and looking their best.

If you feel like you know exactly what to do to lose the weight and keep it off, but are struggling to do so, you’re in the right place. Welcome to The 5% Way Podcast, where myself, registered dietician Paul Salter and my co-host, sustainable weight loss specialist, Micheala Barsotti, have an impactful conversation focused on helping you uncover the root cause of the self-sabotaging behaviors holding you back from achieving sustainable weight loss.

Your transformation begins from the inside out. And our purpose is to accelerate that progress by sharing practical strategies and need to know information to help you reclaim your confidence, control, and inner calm, so that you can feel, look, and be your best.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of The 5% Way Podcast. My name is Paul Salter. I’m a registered dietician, host of the show, and today, your guide in helping you lay out a three step action plan to feeling your best in 2023 and beyond, like literally and beyond. This simple framework I’m going to introduce to you today is something that can always be used. It’s something that I highly recommend you revisit often, you fine tune, you update, edit as necessary, so you continuously feel better and better.

But before we dive into today’s show, just one quick exciting reminder. We are going back to our roots here on the podcast, going back to a brand new name, which isn’t all that new if you have been following me for some time. But The 5% Way Podcast, this name and this show design with Micheala for 50 or so episodes came about as I went deeper and deeper into the 5% community. I thought some congruency in the naming might be helpful. But in reality, I don’t think it made much of a difference. And what is even more exciting is a name like Screw the Scale. More specifically, the name of this podcast will change to Screw the Scale Radio at the turn of the new year. And I promise you, the podcast will be back better than ever. Not only do we already have an exciting list of guests booked and lined up to kick off the first quarter of the new year, but I will be better. Show structure, audio will be better. The information, the takeaways, the action steps will be better.

I’m excited to share this with you and just want to, again, thank you so much for listening. Thank you for being a longtime listener. Thank you for being a new listener. And hey, if this is your first time listening, thank you so much for being here. I’m excited to connect with you, get to know you further, and to hang out, spend a little time in your earbuds on a weekly basis, to help you be the best version of yourself.

And what better time to transition into talking about how we can feel our best in 2023 and beyond. I just really want to kick off today’s episode by inviting you to pause and reflect for a moment on some of the past resolutions or goals that you have set for yourself at the turn of past years.

Now, I can tell you, the last couple of years, I tried to make a very long list of experiences I want to have, or feats I want to accomplish, things I want to do. And some of them have included running a marathon, running a 50 miler, having an ayahuasca experience. All three of those came to fruition, by the way. Going out of the country X number of times, visiting this city, this friend, this location. And you may have also set similar goals or resolutions. I also wanted to read 50 books in a year. I wanted to learn this skill. I wanted to spend time with my parents on four separate occasions. They live in Maryland, I’m in Tampa, I want to see them as much as I can. Our time here is limited, it’s precious, but I digress. I wanted to have X amount of money in my bank account. I wanted to look a certain way.

And as I mentioned, you too probably have a long list of things you desire to do, achieve, and have. And there is nothing wrong with that. But what’s wrong in our approach to achieving, attaining and doing that long list that we have created for ourselves is how we go about actually achieving and attaining the long list that we have created. Because behind wanting to read X number of books, wanting this much money, to lose this weight, where this clothing size, look this way, travel here, visit there, spend time with A, B, and C, is really a feeling or a collection of feelings that we are chasing.

So step one in this three step blueprint is get really, really clear on the feelings you desire, the feeling you are chasing. And the best way to do that is if you already have a list of the goals or things you want to do, accomplish, attain in the new year, look at each one individually and see if you can find the feeling that is underneath said goal, because that’s what you’re really chasing.

So for example, let’s use the most common New Year’s resolution of weight loss. You might want to lose weight, but you probably, underneath that, want to feel confident, in control, healthy and energetic, sexy, strong. One of those is the predominant emotion you are chasing.

You and I might want X amount of money in our bank account. What are we chasing? Financial security, financial safety, financial peace of mind, financial calm, predictability.

You might want to go travel. What are you chasing there? A sense of freedom, a sense of aliveness, a sense of novelty, living life to the fullest.

You might want to read X number of books. What are you seeking? You’re seeking knowledge. You’re seeking to feel trusted, credible, like an expert, a reliable source of information.

Again, behind all the goals you have is a feeling or collection of feelings that you are chasing. You need to get very, very clear on the one to three feelings you want to experience most in this new year.

But let me add a quick caveat. Don’t fucking wait until the new year, start choosing to feel those feelings now. Because that’s actually going to accelerate your journey to building the habits necessary to make those feelings part of your everyday presence. But more on that in a different episode at a different time, or any one of my 3,200 plus Instagram posts, which by the way is a fricking doctorate class in sustainable weight loss, if you haven’t just taken the time to scroll through my feed at @paulsaltercoaching, but I digress.

So when you get really clear on your feelings, what this does is create an opportunity for you to hand pick the most appropriate, effective, efficient action steps to bring those feelings to fruition now, rather than just kind of throwing the things at the wall and hoping something sticks. And hoping, “If I try A, B, C, D, E, F, G, maybe F will finally help me feel confident. Or maybe G will finally help me feel in control.” Does that sound familiar? It should, because it’s another analogy or way of saying when you diet hop from one diet to the next 15, just hoping and praying one sticks, that’s essentially what you’re doing here. You’re wishing, you’re hoping, you’re praying.

But one of my favorite quotes of all time is, “Life isn’t about finding yourself. It is about creating yourself.” So create the feelings you desire through the actions you commit to. Are you with me? Are you smoking what I am rolling?

This is incredibly simple. That does not mean it is easy, I’ll be the first to say that. But it becomes easier when you’re clear on how you want to feel because you can then appropriately align the most effective action step. So if you want to feel healthy, energized, or confident, in control of your food choices, you know logically that choosing an approach that is simple, flexible, unique to you when it comes to your foundational eating habits and working on rebuilding your relationship with food, a more patient, methodical approach is absolutely necessary to achieve and then sustain those feelings. Any quick fix, fad diet, supplement, detox, this, that and the other is only going to bring you momentary sources of those feelings, a quick hit of dopamine. But you’re going to crash and burn in a very short period of time after. So get clear on how you want to feel.

And off the top of my head, I should know this, I don’t know if it was last week’s or a couple weeks ago, I had an episode here, because I don’t have my notes up, about how to best prime yourself to set better goals. That is a must listen to, to help you go and actually take the next step of being primed to get clear on the goal setting or feelings you wish to feel. So highly recommend that episode if you haven’t listened to it already, to prime you, to get really clear on the feelings you desire to feel. And then ultimately begin working on cultivating a short list of action steps to bring about those feelings.

And now that you’re really clear on your feelings, or you will be after you listen to this episode and go through the additional action steps I share. Remember this, two things. Less is more. Stop trying to fucking add 15 new habits to your plate. Drives me fucking bonkers when I see people with this laundry list of 17,000 new habits they’re going to try in their new year. It’s emotionally draining. It’s mentally draining. It’s physically draining. It’s just downright fucking exhausting. Less is more. In fact, you’d probably be better served not trying to add any new habits and trying instead to redirect that energy toward getting rid of the three to five habits that are not serving you, that are holding you back.

And off of that, number two is keep it simple, stupid. The KISS principle. Don’t over-complicate this. You really can’t fuck this up. If you slow down, you simplify, you focus on less is more, so keep it simple. This is not some complex calculus or algebraic proof or theorem we are working through here. This is just about feeling good, feeling confident, feeling in control, strong, energetic, healthy, with live vigor, aliveness. You can’t fuck this up, I promise you. I believe in you, you need to believe in yourself. So less is more. Keep it simple.

Step number two in this blueprint to feeling your best in 2023 and beyond, get clear on why you want to feel that way. Why do you want to feel confident? Why do you want to feel healthy? But don’t make this mistake, don’t provide some surface level bullshit answer such as, “I want to lose 20 pounds to feel healthy. I want to lose 20 pounds so my knees don’t hurt.” And let me be very clear, I don’t want to come across like a condescending asshole. Those goals and those reasons are valid, but you need to go much deeper. You need to keep going deeper and deeper until you get intimately familiar with some of your biggest frustrations, pain points, and past challenging experiences.

Because when you can bring immense clarity and almost relive a micro moment of some of the past hardship that you’ve experienced, that can be motivational fuel to never want to feel that way again. So whether it’s being a role model for your children, living up to your full potential, whatever it may be, you need to get really, really clear as to why you want to get clear on these feelings, which ultimately, remember, is really just getting clear on why you’re going to commit to those action steps that are going to bring about the feelings you desire.

So very, very important you are clear on your why. You might have heard me mention it before. I invite you to take me up on this opportunity now. I have a very powerful seven step why exercise that challenges you through a very concise list of prompts in about a 10 or 15 minute video, to help you get really deep to the core of your motivational emotionally charged why behind wanting to make positive change. I’m more than happy to send you that video and worksheet absolutely free. Just send me a DM on Instagram at @paulsaltercoaching, that says seven whys, and I will gladly send that to the best email that you share with me.

But it’s powerful stuff. It’s really powerful when you dig deeper and push past that surface level why to understand what is truly driving you. Is it a sense of security, a sense of belonging, a fear of success, or not reaching your full potential, a fear of not being there for your children. It’s deep stuff, but I’ll tell you what, it’s life changing. It’s fucking powerful. So dig into it. You deserve it, you’re worth it.

And step number three, tying back to step number one, is you know how you want to feel, you know why you want feel that way. Let me add a little caveat too, you know why you want to feel that way, but also get really clear on how you don’t want to fucking feel. What are you frustrated, fed up, and sick of feeling. Hopeless, frustrated, angry, regretful, resentful, guilty? Get rid of those fucking feelings. Step into abundance, gratitude, positivity, joy, confidence, energy, vigor, healthy, sexy, strong. Step into those. But you’re clear on how you want to feel, you’re clear of why you want to feel that way, get fucking clear on your action steps. Again, keep it simple. Less is more. But get really clear on your action steps.

One of the most common mistakes I see people make, specifically those seeking weight loss at this time of year, really any time of year, let’s be honest, is they’re just taking random action steps that maybe worked for their friend or they saw on Instagram, read on a blog post, whatever it may be. You don’t need to spend four hours in the kitchen meal prepping seven days, or seven hours in the gym, or journaling 60 minutes a day, meditating two hours. You don’t need to do all these things to bring about the feelings you desire. Now, there’s merit in all of them, but you’ve got to find a unique, simplified way that fits your lifestyle. Something feasible that you can commit to, which is why less is more. Something is better than nothing, but put your own spin on it.

I like to say, filter it through the lens of you. If you know a gratitude practice, a journaling practice, a meditation, a meal prep, and a workout routine practice are all going to help you bring about feelings of joy, confidence, and self-love, great. Filter them through the lens of you. Can you take two minutes to write down three things you’re grateful for every day? Awesome. Can you take five minutes to meditate every day? Fucking phenomenal. Can you take three hour sessions per week to work out or move? Fucking great. I love it. Filter it through you. Because when you filter it through the lens of you, that is what is going to fuel consistency the most. And it is consistency and practicality, not perfection and optimism, that is going to lead to significant sustainable results.

Fuck, that was good. That’s one of those one liners. Damn, that’s the quote I should move to the beginning of this episode, but I’ll leave it as is. I hope that stood out to you, resonated with you, seeping into your DNA right now.

Because that’s all I have for you on today’s episode. I’m proud of you for being here. I appreciate you being here more than you’ll ever know. I hope that you find this episode incredibly tactful. It should come across as simple. This is not rocket science. I didn’t just blow your mind with new information. I might have blown your mind with how I packaged and presented it, but you’ve got this. You can’t fuck this up. So get clear on how you want to feel, get clear on why you want to feel that way, and how you do not want to feel any longer. Get clear on your action steps. Keep it simple. Less is more. Remember, you are worth and deserving of everything you desire, but your biggest turning point this year and in the many decades to come is going to be your ability to shift your focus, time, energy, and attention to how you want to feel. Do that. Watch your life change dramatically at an accelerated rate, and watch me be there for you every step of the way, cheering you on.

Thank you so much for listening, ladies and gentlemen. I appreciate you sincerely. If you’ve found today’s episode helpful, do me a favor, share it with one person. Share it on your Instagram, your Facebook, or send the direct link to someone you care about to help have a positive impact on their lives as well. And if you have not done so already, 30 seconds is all it takes to leave a genuine rating and review, which helps me understand what type of content you’re enjoying on the show. And also helps to get the show out in front of more new people, so I can have a positive impact on their lives as well.

Have a phenomenal rest of your day. Connect with me on Instagram, and say hi at @paulsaltercoaching if you haven’t done so already. I’ll see you there. I’ll talk to you in the next episode. And remember, Screw that Scale, because Screw the Scale Radio is coming. We’re a mere couple weeks away, bringing it back at the turn of the new year. I’ll catch you then.